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Crime

Mum’s effort to rebuild her and her children’s lives after leaving controlling partner

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  • Having courage to leave an abusive relationship can lead to a new life

A VICTIM of controlling and coercive behaviour has offered this advice to anyone living with domestic abuse as she works to rebuild her and her children’s lives.

She has bravely shared her experiences as part of Dyfed-Powys Police’s winter campaign, which aims to speak to people affected by domestic abuse, stalking and harassment, empowering them to report incidents, and offering means to find support.

For Sarah*, there were warning signs that something wasn’t right in her marriage. But like many others, she had been manipulated into believing her husband’s behaviour towards her was normal.

In reality, he was coercively controlling her. That means he was using threats, humiliation and intimidation or other abuse to harm, punish, or frighten her.

These are behaviours perpetrators use to isolate victims from support, deprive them of independence and control their everyday lives.
“What I’ve learned is that it doesn’t need to be extreme behaviour for it to have the effect it does,” Sarah said. “He never physically hurt me, but he is a very strong man, and I knew he could have.
“He controlled me, manipulated me, made me feel and look worthless in front of my children and family. I was gaslit and brainwashed, and living a deluded life.”

Sarah explained that one of her friends witnessed some behaviour that made her suspect it was abusive, and sent messages with links to places she could find support. This intervention prompted her to take action, and she fled the family home with her children
“My friend told me she thought it was domestic abuse and that it wouldn’t be long until I left him,” she said. “A few days later, we were out.
“I think I had known for some time, but I didn’t have the support of my family. If I did raise concerns I was told ‘oh it’s fine’ because they don’t see the emotional abuse. It’s partly because of the way I was brought up that I ended up with someone like him. I had to shut up and put up with it.
“But because somebody else validated it, it was like a light had been shone on the situation.”

After spending time in a women’s refuge, Sarah found a new home and is now rebuilding their lives.

However, as her ex-husband has contact with their children, she says she can never truly relax knowing he is still present in their lives.
“It’s hyper vigilance,” she said. “It’s emotionally and physically draining, and it’s not something you can sustain.
“It’s affected every area of my life. My finances, my housing, my emotional health, my children’s mental health, my work. Because of the brainwashing and the delusion, it’s taken me a long time to work out how to have safe relationships. Even with friends, it takes a long time to believe they truly want to spend time with me.

“You have to look for safe people – but you have to learn to trust yourself first. What he did to me was degrading and dehumanising. Looking back, I wonder how I could possibly have thought I could change him. The only person I could change was myself, and I’m doing that now.”

If any of Sarah’s story resonates with you, or you need to report domestic abuse, stalking or harassment, you can contact Dyfed-Powys Police in the following ways:
• Report online: https://bit.ly/DPPContactOnline
• Email: [email protected]
• Call: 101
• If you are deaf, hard of hearing, or speech impaired text the non-emergency number on 07811 311 908
In an emergency, always call 999.
*If you feel you need support in contacting police, there are organisations that can help you. Click here to find them, or search online for Live Fear Free or Women’s Aid – both have free helplines available.

Crime

Man jailed after strangling partner and attacking police officer

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A MILFORD HAVEN man who strangled his partner during a violent domestic assault before attacking a police officer has been jailed for two years.

Timothy John, aged 38, of Howarth Close, Milford Haven, appeared at Swansea Crown Court after admitting a series of offences arising from an incident in October.

The court heard that John had been arguing with his partner about his drug use when the situation escalated into violence. Prosecutor Craig Jones said the defendant grabbed the woman by the throat and held her in a chokehold for around ten seconds, leaving her struggling to breathe and fearing she would lose consciousness.

During the attack, John also punched and kicked the victim before smashing a glass bong over her head. At the time, the woman was still in her underwear and managed to flee the property and run into the street to seek help.

John also damaged the victim’s mobile phone by biting the screen, rendering it unusable.

Police attended the address the following day to take a statement from the victim and discovered John hiding in a bedroom. When officers attempted to detain him, he assaulted a female police officer, knocking her glasses to the floor, before escaping from the property.

The defendant handed himself in around 24 hours later.

John pleaded guilty to intentional strangulation, assault occasioning actual bodily harm, assaulting an emergency worker, criminal damage, and escaping from lawful custody. The court was told he has five previous convictions for six offences, although none for violence.

Defending, Dan Griffiths said John accepted the relationship was over and had been using cocaine at the time of the incident, which had made him paranoid, volatile and unpredictable.

He told the court that John had previously worked as a fisherman, roofer and welder, but had struggled with alcohol and substance misuse. Mr Griffiths added that a pre-sentence report highlighted a difficult upbringing and noted a lack of insight into his offending, with concerns that he attempted to minimise his behaviour.

The defence urged the court to consider a suspended sentence to allow John to work with probation services.

Sentencing, Judge Catherine Richards said the offence involved serious strangulation and a sustained assault on an intimate partner, leaving the victim frightened in her own home.

John was sentenced to two years’ imprisonment and made subject to a ten-year restraining order preventing any contact with his former partner.

Dyfed-Powys Police have been asked to provide a custody image of the defendant.

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Crime

Police investigate suspicious disappearance of white-tailed eagle in mid Wales

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Appeal launched after satellite tag is found cut from bird and dumped on remote moorland

POLICE and wildlife crime officers are investigating the suspicious disappearance of a satellite-tagged white-tailed eagle in mid Wales after its tracking device was found cut off and deliberately hidden.

Dyfed-Powys Police is working alongside the UK National Wildlife Crime Unit (NWCU) following the disappearance of the juvenile bird in the Newtown area.

Officers say the satellite tag and harness were recovered from remote moorland and show clear signs of having been removed from the bird using a sharp instrument, most likely a knife, before being concealed in an apparent attempt to dispose of the evidence.

Despite searches in the area, the body of the eagle has not yet been located.

Police are now appealing for information from anyone who may have been in the area at the time and witnessed suspicious activity.

Investigators are particularly keen to hear from people who were:

  • At or around Gwgia Reservoir, Tregynon, between 11:00am and 1:00pm on Saturday (Sept 13)
  • On access land near Bryn y Fawnog between midday and 3:00pm on the same day

All potential lines of enquiry are being pursued, including detailed forensic examination for DNA and fingerprints.

Police are working closely with the tag owners, the Roy Dennis Wildlife Foundation, and Forestry England to analyse tracking data and support the investigation.

The disappearance is being treated as a serious wildlife crime. The persecution of birds of prey remains a national policing priority, with species such as white-tailed eagles, golden eagles and hen harriers fully protected by law.

Satellite tags are widely used for conservation and research purposes, providing vital information about bird movements and survival. Each tag carries contact details so that any recovered device can be returned directly to researchers.

Members of the public who enjoy the countryside are urged to remain vigilant and report any suspicious activity involving birds of prey or their habitats.

Anyone with information is asked to contact Dyfed-Powys Police online, by calling 101 quoting reference 25000766626. Alternatively, information can be passed anonymously to Crimestoppers on 0800 555 111.

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Crime

Teenager faces multiple charges after series of alleged incidents

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Youth accused of assaults on police, criminal damage and railway trespass

A TEENAGE boy has appeared before the courts charged with a series of alleged assaults, public order offences and criminal damage incidents said to have taken place in Haverfordwest over several days in December.

The youth, who cannot be named for legal reasons due to his age, is accused of multiple offences alleged to have occurred between Wednesday (Dec 11) and Monday (Dec 16).

The charges include several counts of assault by beating, obstructing or resisting a police officer, using threatening or abusive behaviour, and criminal damage involving property valued at under £5,000.

It is alleged that a number of the incidents involved police officers acting in the execution of their duty. One charge relates to alleged trespass on or near a railway, while another concerns an arrest for an alleged breach of the peace.

The teenager appeared before the Youth Court, where reporting restrictions were confirmed under Section 49 of the Children and Young Persons Act 1933, preventing the publication of any information likely to identify him.

The court made further directions in the case, and the youth was remanded on conditional bail pending future hearings.

The case remains ongoing.

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