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Who the heck are the reporters behind Pembrokeshire Cachu News?

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WE’RE reading it, we’re laughing over it and there’s no denying that the people of Pembrokeshire have grown to love it. 

But who the heck are Barri Bryth, Ceredig Pysgod-Jones and his co-editor in chief, Gito Goch? In other words, the team responsible for  Pembrokeshire Cachu News? 

This week the Pembrokeshire Herald tracked them down to a pub in Pembroke town centre. 

Gito, like all true journos, was knocking back the vino sacramento, and Ceredig was sticking to shandy because of a hangover from the previous day’s funeral. 

The landlord ushered the GPT (the gutter press trio), to an upper room, well away from his other customers.  No surprises there, then. 

Barri Bryth, conspicuous by his absence

“I’ve always wondered what was up here,” said Gito. 

 And so began two hours of ceaseless comedy as they launched from one story to the next with that dynamic spark that typifies Pembrokeshire Cachu News. 

As they talked, they played with Lego and drew on brown paper bags with their crayons.  I kid you not. 

“Here you are,” says Gito, shoving a packet of biscuits across the table. 

“ Here’s a packet of Hobnobs from Barri Bryth.  Why does he eat hobnobs?  Because he’s a nob, that’s why. 

“God knows where he’s got to this afternoon.  In fact we often wonder whether he really exists, but he exists in our head. 

“Our ultimate goal is to bring Barri to life and turn him into a black and white ‘film noir’ played by Rhod Gilbert and that man who goes on about Welshness…What’s his name? 

“Michael Sheen. That’ the one. He’ll play Gito Goch. 

“Barri, see, is your typical reporter in his corduroy trousers, collarless shirt, an ill-fitting tweed jacket, coke-bottle glasses and suspenders.” 

Ceredig Pysgod-Jones takes a measured slurp of his shandy. 

“I think you mean braces, Gito.  Barri doesn’t wear suspenders.”  

“Ah yes, braces.  And Barri just wanders around the place saying ‘I don’t f****** know who I am’.  That’s Barri.” 

Brith, Psygod-Jones and Gito Goch were born during the Covid lockdown of 2020. 

“It was all because of Nick in the sandwich shop in Pembroke Dock.  She started telling us about the council watch page and so we started reading it and realised just how daft most of the stuff on it was.  

“Remember that bloke who was complaining to the council that the grass was never being cut?  And then when it was cut, he started complaining all over again, that it had gone all over his car? 

“So during lockdown, Ceredig and I started writing our own stories for our own amusement and we launched Pembrokeshire Cachu News.” 

They initially set their sights on attracting a couple of hundred followers but, following their Cleddau Bridge story, they realised that things were starting to turn. 

“We said the Cleddau Bridge was going to close for six months because ‘Newky and  Brown’ were going to repair one of the main pillars with a new formula super concrete called ‘Uber Beton’,” says Gito. 

“I wrote that story in seven minutes.  Within ten minutes I could see it being shared 50, 60, 70, 80 times. 

“And this was only a few weeks after we launched Pembrokeshire Cachu News, so we knew that that story was our catalyst.  Overnight we’d gained 500 followers.” 

Today, their figure stands at well over 8,000. 

“We never imagined this happening as even today, me and Gito are just doing it for our own amusement and for our own mental sanity,” says Ceredig. 

“But we try and latch onto local history, and that seems to wind people up quite a bit which helps the figures.  

“We’ve really got it in for Whitland because the people of Whitland complain about everything.  And then we try and cause rivalry between the Tenby Sharks and the Penally Crows and as for the Mount Estate….you’ve only got to mention it and there’s hell to pay.” 

Mr Chizzit from Birmingham is another PCN character who’s good at raising hackles. 

“During the covid lockdown we ran a story saying that Mr Chizzit had driven his Volvo down from Birmingham to Tenby and my God, did it make people angry.  We were laughing all the way to the bank with that one, but it made us realise that that’s what we had to do.  Make people angry. 

“And so Mr Chizzit travelled from Birmingham to Tenby again last year and said he wanted the Gosker Rock to be bulldozed down as it was spoiling his view. 

“And the fantastic thing is that people actually believe this stuff. 

“The one that really got people angry was in the summer of 2021 when we said that the refugees had escaped from the Penally Camp and were squatting in the abandoned Imperial Hotel in Tenby and were going to turn it into a Welsh kebab restaurant.  People were writing in and saying they were never going to go to Tenby again. 

“Only once we’ve had a pull a story, and that was when we said that the airfield in Carew was going to house 8,000 refugees from Penally Camp.  We didn’t know that the airfield was owned by a private company so naturally they weren’t too happy when they read this.” 

Gito admits to being the PCN editor who tends to throw caution to the wind and tell it just like it is, while Ceredig is more restrained, extremely dry and exceptionally cutting. 

“But our intention is never to hurt or belittle people,” says Ceredig.  “Except our friends, of course. 

“We’re doing it just to amuse ourselves and hopefully to bring a smile to the people of Pembrokeshire.  And one of the best things is when we see one of our rival newspapers asking people what’s the best thing about Pembrokeshire. And more and more people are saying it’s ‘Pembrokeshire Cachu News’.” 

The way things are looking, this trend is set to continue for a very long time indeed. 

Community

Council warns of icy conditions as temperatures drop

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ROAD users in Pembrokeshire are being urged to exercise caution tonight as temperatures are forecast to dip below freezing.

Pembrokeshire County Council has announced that road surface temperatures could reach as low as -2°C, with the possibility of sleet or snow on higher ground. In response, precautionary salting of the county’s primary routes will be carried out this evening and overnight.

A spokesperson for the council said: “Road users are advised to take care if travelling on untreated roads.”

Motorists are reminded to plan ahead and drive carefully, particularly in areas that may not have been treated.

Stay tuned to The Herald for updates on road conditions and weather warnings.

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Community

Stallholders wanted for Milford Haven Christmas Market

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MILFORD HAVEN BUSINESS CIRCLE is calling for stallholders to join the town’s festive Christmas Market, set to bring holiday cheer on Friday, December 6, and Saturday, December 7, 2024.

The market will take place at the Lower Charles Street Car Park, promising a vibrant mix of stalls and attractions. Organizers are seeking a variety of vendors, including those offering gifts, children’s toys and games, food, cakes, flowers, and more.

There’s also an open invitation for someone with small children’s rides to add to the festive fun. A highlight of the event will be the Grinch’s Grotto, offering an entertaining twist to this year’s celebrations.

If you’re interested in having a stall, contact the Milford Haven Business Circle via email at [email protected] for more information.

Mark your calendars and join the excitement as Milford Haven celebrates the season in style!

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Community

Milford Haven Business Circle launches litter-free zone initiative

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MILFORD HAVEN BUSINESS CIRCLE is calling on the community to join the launch of its new Litter-Free Zone.

In partnership with Keep Wales Tidy Pembrokeshire, the initiative aims to create a cleaner, greener town centre while promoting environmental responsibility and community pride.

The event marks a collective effort to raise awareness about the importance of maintaining a litter-free environment and highlights the far-reaching benefits of a cleaner town centre.

The organisation says that a cleaner, more attractive town centre is key to drawing visitors and potential investors.

This initiative is expected to stimulate economic activity, benefiting local businesses and encouraging growth in Milford Haven.

The project not only enhances the town’s appearance but also instils a sense of pride among residents. By improving cleanliness, the initiative aims to encourage more community participation in local events and activities.

Reducing litter has significant environmental benefits, including:

  • Protecting Wildlife: Preventing harm to animals caused by ingestion or entanglement.
  • Cleaner Air and Water: Reducing pollution in streets and waterways, fostering healthier ecosystems.
  • Sustainable Practices: Encouraging recycling and proper waste disposal to cut down on the town’s environmental footprint.
  • Creating Green Spaces: Supporting the development of habitats, recreational areas, and improved air quality for residents.

The Milford Haven Business Circle believes this initiative will set a strong example for other communities, demonstrating the power of collective action in fostering a sustainable future.

By joining this movement, participants can contribute to making Milford Haven a shining example of environmental care and community cooperation. Let’s work together to transform our town into a cleaner, greener space for all to enjoy.

Stay tuned for event details and updates. Together, we can make a difference!

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