Crime

Domestic abuse victims explains difficulty leaving abusive partner

Published

11 months ago

December 18, 2023

A WOMAN who suffered years of emotional control and physical assaults at the hands of her partner has opened up about the difficulty of leaving an abusive relationship.

While it can be easy for those on the outside to ask ‘why don’t you just leave’, there are often fears around housing, money, or the impact leaving might have on children. And as Jess explains, someone who has been abused might still have a form of connection with their abuser, or has been manipulated into thinking they have changed.

Jess has spoken out about three years of emotional and physical abuse as part of Dyfed-Powys Police’s winter campaign, which aims to empower those living with domestic abuse, stalking or harassment to report incidents and find support.

When Jess started a relationship with her ex-partner, she admits there were early – if subtle – signs of abusive behaviour, which stemmed from his jealousy. While friends picked up on these behaviours, Jess would be told by her partner that they were ‘interfering’.

“He always convinced me that he was just emotional due to the strength of his feelings for me and that he obviously didn’t mean the nastier things he said under the influence of alcohol,” she said.

“My friends tried to tell me the relationship could have been considered abusive, but I was deeply in denial.”

Over time, the abuse Jess faced escalated. She was called derogatory names, emotionally controlled, and was repeatedly accused of being unfaithful. If she spent time away from home, her partner wanted constant contact.

“Time spent with friends would always result in abuse when I went back home, so there were times when I decided that it wasn’t worth it,” she said.

“He would constantly question me on what I was doing and my feelings towards him, he went through my phone behind my back, read my diary and would use entries from the past against me.

“For some months, despite his emotionally abusive behaviour, I always believed he would never physically hurt me.”

The emotional abuse did lead to physical assaults, however, and Jess was subject to attacks and threats. Following one incident she took the brave step in calling Dyfed-Powys Police after fleeing with her phone.

“For once I had physical evidence in the form of a cut, so I thought I would be taken more seriously, rather than it being just his word against mine,” she said. “Until then I had always felt as though anything within my relationship was my own mess to sort out.”

Jess learned that she had been the victim of domestic abuse in the form of controlling and coercive behaviour for two years.

“I was surprised when the police said I’d described one of the more serious situations of domestic abuse they’d ever encountered, based on just how much I’d come to accept as normal,” she said.

“Up to this point I had felt embarrassed for involving the police and assumed they’d dismiss it because I didn’t have serious physical injuries.”

Jess’s abuser was arrested and charged with assault.

Despite this, she was manipulated into restarting their relationship a few short months later, with promises that he had changed. However, she suffered another year of abuse before calling it off once more.

While they are now separated, and Jess knows he poses a danger to her, she fears she might never be free from him.

“I feel massively emotionally affected and traumatised by our time together,” she said.

“He’s still contacting me on a daily basis trying to win me back. I’d rather have no contact with him at all, but he keeps talking me round to it. I respond to this because part of me has been conditioned to please him to avoid the abuse.

“Sometimes I fear I will never truly escape him – and that my remaining friends will abandon me to this fate.”

While Jess appreciates how difficult it is to speak out, she hopes that reading her story might be the push someone needs to seek help.

“I always liked to think of myself as a strong, intelligent, independent woman and never imagined I would find myself in this sort of situation, but it really can happen to anyone,” she said.

“It’s not your fault. The only person who should feel shame in an abusive relationship is the abuser.”

If any of Jess’s story resonates with you, or you need to report domestic abuse, stalking or harassment, you can contact Dyfed-Powys Police in the following ways:

Report online: https://bit.ly/DPPContactOnline
Email: [email protected]

Call: 101

If you are deaf, hard of hearing, or speech impaired text the non-emergency number on 07811 311 908
In an emergency, always call 999.

If you feel you need support in contacting police, there are organisations that can help you. Click here to find them, or search online for Live Fear Free, Women’s Aid or the National Stalking Helpline – all of which have free helplines available.

Crime

Ceredigion man sentenced for selling £150,000 in illegal DVDs

Published

2 hours ago

November 14, 2024

Tom Sinclair

A CEREDIGION man has been sentenced for selling counterfeit DVDs worth £150,000 under major brand names without authorization.

David Robert Thomas, 47, from Sarnau, ran a sophisticated online operation, producing and selling fake DVDs labeled with brands like Netflix, Amazon, Disney, Sony, and Universal City Studios LLC. Thomas used seven different websites and managed multiple bank and PayPal accounts, including those of family members, to carry out his business.

Councillor Matthew Vaux, Ceredigion County Council’s Cabinet Member for Public Protection, said: “Counterfeiting is often thought of as a victimless crime, but it harms the local economy by undermining legitimate businesses that pay taxes and create real jobs. This result sends a clear message that counterfeit sales will not be tolerated, and we will act against offenders.”

Thomas pleaded guilty at Swansea Crown Court on Monday (Nov 11) and was sentenced to 20 months in prison, suspended for 18 months. His sentence includes a four-month curfew and fifteen Rehabilitation Activity Requirement days.

Under the Crime Act 2002, forfeiture proceedings will follow to reclaim the financial benefits from Thomas’s criminal activities. Judge Richards took into account the market value of equivalent genuine goods, the sophisticated setup of Thomas’s business, and his previously clean record in reaching the sentencing decision.

The case was brought forward successfully by Ceredigion County Council’s Trading Standards Service.

Crime

Welsh shop workers face ‘surge in shoplifting linked violence and abuse’ says union

Published

15 hours ago

November 13, 2024

Tom Sinclair

A NEW survey by retail trade union Usdaw has revealed disturbing figures on the abuse, threats, and violence endured by Welsh shop workers, with incidents increasingly linked to shoplifting. Released during Respect for Shop Workers Week, which runs from November 11 to 17, the statistics highlight a troubling trend that is impacting thousands of retail employees.

Usdaw’s survey, based on responses from over 4,000 retail staff, shows that in the past year:

69% experienced verbal abuse.
45% were threatened by customers.
17% were assaulted.

Usdaw General Secretary Paddy Lillis commented on the findings, saying: “Shop workers deserve far more respect than they receive. These reports from Welsh retail staff make grim reading. It is shocking to see over two-thirds of our members subjected to abuse, threats, and violence. Seven in ten of these incidents are related to theft, much of it tied to addiction and organised crime.”

Usdaw’s survey suggests that shoplifting is increasingly becoming a flashpoint for violence. Many shop workers report encountering hardened criminals who appear to steal goods “to order” or to fund addictions. According to the union, incidents are on the rise across Wales, with police-reported shoplifting up by 33% in the past year.

Usdaw member testimonies paint a vivid picture of the dangers faced on the shop floor:

One respondent described being “spat at, pushed against a wall, punched, and threatened with a knife.”
Another reported that, after refusing to sell alcohol, they were told to “F**k off” and threatened with a beating by a group of five.
Others spoke of being punched, spat on, and verbally abused, with threats that often left lasting emotional scars.

New measures on the horizon

Usdaw has been calling for greater legal protection for retail workers for years, and it appears these calls are finally being heard. The recent Crime and Policing Bill, announced in the King’s Speech, proposes to:

End the £200 threshold for prosecuting shoplifters, which has been a source of frustration for retailers.
Introduce town centre banning orders for repeat offenders.
Allocate funding for tackling organised shoplifting and increase police presence in shopping areas.

“We welcome these new measures and hope they will provide much-needed protection,” said Mr. Lillis. “After 14 years of neglect under successive Tory governments, we are encouraged by the steps the new Labour government is taking to address the retail crime epidemic.”

As Christmas approaches—a time when retail crime tends to peak—Usdaw is urging the public to “respect shop workers” and remain calm as stores become busier.

Usdaw, which represents around 360,000 members, primarily in retail, launched its Freedom From Fear Campaign to tackle the growing issue of violence against shop workers. The final results of the 2024 survey are expected in March 2025.

Crime

Pembroke Dock resident faces court over dog control breaches

Published

21 hours ago

November 13, 2024

Court Reporter

PHILIP Murray, 52, of 11 Picton Place, Pembroke Dock, will appear at Haverfordwest Magistrates’ Court on Thursday (Nov 14) to face several charges of breaching a community protection notice. The notice, issued under the Anti-social Behaviour, Crime and Policing Act 2014, required Murray to control his dogs in response to repeated disturbances.

The charges relate to incidents from May to September 2024, when Murray allegedly failed to comply with the restrictions set out in a notice issued on January 3, 2024. Court documents state that despite multiple warnings, Murray continued to disregard the order, leading to ongoing issues linked to his dogs’ behaviour.

If found guilty, Murray could face a Level 4 fine for each offence. The hearing is scheduled to take place from 2:00 pm to 4:00 pm in Courtroom 1, presided over by the Ceredigion and Pembrokeshire Adult Panel.

The case underscores the role of community protection notices in addressing persistent anti-social behavior.